wednesday morning metaphor time.
Thinking about my future, I always have a little Decision Meter in the back of my head that measures how much what I want to do is actually What I Want to Do, and how much of it is just me getting carried away by a TV show I’m watching.
Example A: In Year 8 I spent a fair few months wanting to be a doctor or paramedic because I was watching Scrubs almost every day.
The thing with choosing to go into the film industry (a decision made this past week after 6 months/a few years of planning to read Philosophy at Oxbridge) is that if it’s something I’m enthusiastic about because I’m going through PBFB videos at the moment…then it doesn’t matter. There’s no danger or inconsistency in wanting to make films ‘just’ because you’re watching videos of someone else making films.
The metaphor I mentioned is this: my life is so freaking media saturated, there’s no point in drying myself off and going off in some other direction; I might as well stay in the water and grow some fins.
So here’s to growing fins
Sunday 2nd March 2014
Wake Me Up by Ed Sheeran at 7:45am. Then sociology notes until like 12. Then scanning yesterdays drawings and printing sociology notes. I asked my dad about Parkinson because we were looking at a transcript of one of his Billy Connolly interviews for english. I didn’t know he was considered such an accomplished interviewer…so I spent some time watching youtube clips of him with Helen Mirren and Oliver Reed.
Then fucking ages wandering around the internet looking reading about Dave McKean for my art homework. I still haven’t finished the essay for that class that I planned to finish at 4pm.
It feels like a wasted day.
Saturday 1st March 2014
Woke up an hour and a half later than planned and freaked the frack out because my train was leaving in 10 minutes. My dad gave me a lift into Brighton instead and I ended up getting to the coach station 40 minutes early. I asked my dad about universities and he mentioned he liked the working atmosphere at Southampton, where most of the university’s income was coming from jobs it was completing in its various fields.
The bus was a little late. I did film and sociology homework and stared out the window. Then I was in London. Bus to Victoria and Albert Museum. Into the sculpture hall through the side entrance. Wandering around and drawing for 7 hours, then walked back to London Victoria. Sat in a Cafe Nero until it closed at 8. They do the greatest brownies.
Friday 28th February 2014
We had to act out a relationship with wooden spoons in Sociology. I’m sensing a pattern of being too tired in the morning to deal with classes. I spent the three hour break mucking around with photoshop making Banksy-esque edits which I was really really happy with. I listened to a few more episodes of Past Bing Future Bing. Art class was literally just two hours of writing stuff up and cutting out photos. Then a whole load of pasting stuff down at home. Then a quick look at what universities had Film and Philosophy joint courses which led to a 4 hour meltdown trying to figure out my future. At the moment I’m leaning towards an animation course. I know I definitely want to take an art course rather than a philosophy course.
Journal Booster Pack: Edition One
The time is 00:04 and I have spent 6 hours cutting out pictures of myself stretching a sweater around, using GIMP. Because of some element of technical substandardness in my life it takes fucking ages to save, so I have spent my spare-ish time discovering Past Bing Future Bing (which I am listening to right now). I have even filmed and edited my first video of PMFM (Post Me, Future Me//Past Marie, Future Marie//Post-Menstrual.FM…take your pick). So that’s a vlogging project set and started etc.
I like tea.
Thursday 27th February
I woke up when my dad knocked on my door at 6:40am to get me up for school. I’d crashed out as soon as I got home the day before so I’d been in bed for like 13 hours. My curtains were open from where I’d been looking at the clear evening sky on Wednesday, and I could see the dark grey clouds that were out there now. Not my favourite start to a day. I was still feeling tired and shitty during Film Studies; I had to deliver a presentation and the worst of it was I was totally prepared to do it on Monday but today I really wasn’t up for it.
2 1/2 hours of my two hour break were in the library, listening to Youth Lagoon and trying to do my Philosophy homework (due yesterday and still unfinished). I left at 1:10ish to go eat bread in the park…because apparently I’m a pigeon. English was actually, surprisingly, pretty good. Mostly writing. Philosophy; we finished listening to a podcast about Locke’s letter concerning tolerance, there wasn’t much new but it was a nice end to the day.
Met Alice’s mum on the train and she gave me a lift home.
Right now the sky is blue. There are some dark grey clouds but you can’t really see them from where I’m sitting. Both windows are open so I count that as a win for temperature. At this point I’m just writing facts about the weather to avoid my art homework.
Nashville had a really great song but apart from that it wasn’t that great at all. I might just stop watching tv shows until Game of Thrones comes out. I’m already on a self-imposed Modern Family ban since I stayed up til 2am watching it last Tuesday.
Monday 24th February 2014
I decided a thing!
A remarkable feat, considering that usually when I’m decisive I expect to either change my mind much later or else experience regret-…I should clarify; I’m not talking about an “am I going to pass her the`lemonade or not?” kind of decision, I’m talking more “I’m going to take A-Level Sociology next year because we do criminology and I can spend the first half of the year pretending to be Batman (or Robin…or Nightwing…Sociology has lost relevance, I feel)” kinda decision.
Honestly the main reason I’m going to take Sociology is because I’ve had trouble deciding on a third subject and, out of all the options, it fits in best with Philosophy. Philosophy is the one 2000% Certainty I Am Taking This Next Year decision. A statement which I feel nullifies my earlier negativity concerning my decision making capabilities…
So far I have given little detail of my actual day, but it was, for the most part, a normal college day, and you’ll pick up the events that constitute that as we go along. One thing though: today was the day when I wore that pale blue t-shirt and coral red button-down after 5 1/2 months of dark grey and navy sweaters; every time I looked down it felt like staring at a white sheet of paper sitting in a patch of sunlight.
I finished The Bolivian Diaries by Ernesto Che Guevara in the Park, in my free period after lunch. I just had his Communiques that the publishers had put in the back left to read.
Went to the city library after school and got out another batch of graphic novels (and some No.1 Ladies’ Detective Agency), I read Embroideries by Marjane Satrapi while I was there. I enjoyed it as a short set of shorter stories, but it was no Persepolis 2 (I haven’t actually read Persepolis yet). I haven’t figured out how to identify or describe my illustration tastes in general yet, but I really like Satrapi’s style.
On the train home [the 19:08] I finished Days of the Bagnold Summer by Joff Winterhart (I didn’t read the author’s name until just now and it sounds like something out of a modernised Game of Thrones). http://mitchul.unblog.fr/files/2014/02/lete-des-bagnold-joff-winterhart-2.jpg this is a page from the book that I found on Google. This is my new favourite style for the moment; I love the waterstain colouring and shading, and the balance between a sleek and a discomforting representation of the human image. Also the unobtrusive narrative that doesn’t pull at the hem of your dress trying to get you to feel pathos for the characters, that’s something new for me in stories that incorporate Teen Angst so I really liked the book.
Last was The Hypo: The Melancholic Young Lincoln by Noah Van Sciver. More of the same on the commentary: loved the illustration and the story. I didn’t know anything about Lincoln’s life before reading this book so getting to know another cool historical figure’s history was great.
Final note: Figure out how to express approval without using adjectives.
Four visual artists; Octavi Serra, Mateu Targa, Daniel Llugany and Pau Garcia have embarked on a street art installation in Barcelona entitled ‘Hands’. Sculptures of hands in various poses are placed in public spaces to bring attention to the social problems of the economic crisis in Spain.
Broken Mirror/Evening Sky (Anscochrome), 2012
Archival Inkjet Print
Edition of 3
70 3/4 x 56 1/4 inches